Consumer Guide for Today's Media

It’s baby season in Hollywood, and the paparazzos are out in full force.

Pregnant Jessica Alba – who has always been fiercely protective of her privacy but is even more so now that she’s got a little one in her belly – frequently uses big shopping bags to cover her growing bump, which is what will net the photogs the big bucks if they can get a shot of it. Angelina Jolie has never confirmed publicly that she is expecting her fifth – and sixth, if reports are true that they’re expecting twins – child with partner Brad Pitt, but the media picked up on her hint when she revealed her bump at a recent awards gala. Jamie Lynn Spears never wants to talk about her pregnancy, but the cameras still follow her as she shops for gifts to put on her baby registry – picked out in gender neutral colors, to hopefully throw the hungry paparazzi off the scent.

Why is everyone so fascinated with pregnant celebrities? The past month has seen Christina Aguilera, Nicole Ritchie, and Jennifer Lopez all on the cover of People with their bundles of joy – and I assume Halle Berry and her newborn daughter are next. When celebrities like Nicole Kidman announce their pregnancy, a pack of photogs descend on them like they have never heard of a pregnant woman before.

And for the poor starlets who gain half an inch to their waist, the media takes a mile – suddenly they’re pregnant. Just ask Jennifer Love Hewitt, this week’s victim of false pregnancy assumptions.

I can understand Jessica’s annoyance, Angelina’s silence, and Jamie Lynn’s secrecy about the sex of her baby. Pregnancy is a very personal matter, something to only be shared between the woman who is pregnant, her partner, and the loved ones that they choose to invite into the excitement. Really, celebrity pregnancies are no one’s business. But there is something about a baby bump that sells magazines – I’ll admit it, I’ve bought ‘em – and the paparazzos won’t let up.

I salute the pregnant celebrities who put up with the madness that is the paparazzi – I’m not sure if I could do it. To Jessica, I say hold that Nieman Marcus bag right at your belly if you want to. Angelina, no words are necessary – your pregnancy is your own business. And to Jamie Lynn, I’m just sorry that you have to face such a daily media onslaught at such a young age.

Pregnancy is one of life’s most beautiful gifts, and it should be respected as such. The media should keep their notepads and cameras at a distance and allow these stars to experience this miracle in peace.

Enough preaching.