SURRY, Va.--Five pit bulls addressed their concerns regarding Michael Vick's illegal dog-fighting operation in a press conference Tuesday afternoon in Surry.
One pit bull, Chevy Chaser, was upset about the response time of Virginia officials, and patrons, in uncovering the scandal.
Chaser said he tried to drag a United Postal Service official by the pant leg onto the property, but the official threw a bone into the yard, distracting him momentarily.
After a National Football League spokesman announced that Vick lost his "Kibbles 'n Bits" endorsement for the Atlanta Falcons, one enraged pit bull bit a cameraman's rear-end.
"I'd eat HIS Kibbles 'n Bits if I could find the Weiner dog," said Spikey Lee, one of the canines involved in Vick's operation. Lee had no previous knowledge of the endorsement.
Other pit bulls spoke up at the conference concerning their treatment and future plans.
"Grrr, ruff ruff," said Fluffy McMuffin, a canine who was pronounced too fat to fight. "Bark, BARK BARK!"
McMuffin said his lawyer was researching equal opportunity laws, and would sue for pyschological damages and the worker's compensation he did not receive. McMuffin's therapist will testify in his defense at the trial scheduled for late November.
The pit bulls are suing jointly for possession of Vick's estate and hope to urinate on him during the court proceedings.